Stormy mUNday

As a kid, the one day I dreaded most of all was the first day of school after summer vacation. I mean, after you got into the month of August, it was just there. Waiting. Getting closer with every sunny morning that you rolled out of bed, ready to have nothing but fun.

So you shook it off as you hurriedly splashed water on your face and wet your toothbrush to fool the toothbrush police before rushing out to play, and you told yourself that you still had a few weeks...couple of weeks...almost a week...a few days...AIEEE! It was the night before the terrible day! Where did the summer go?!

Well, next to that first day of school, there was no day that I dreaded more than e-v-e-r-y  s-i-n-g-l-e Monday (that wasn't part of summer vacation or a holiday). It wasn't just that I never finished my homework or studied for the big test. It was just that Monday meant an end of freedom.

"Clear the yard! Prisoners return to the block!"

There were other things too. It always rained on Mondays. There was never a snow storm on Mondays. Teachers always sought to get even by scheduling big exams for Mondays. The kid you narrowly escaped on Friday afternoon always said, "I'll get you on Monday!"

Fast forward. Finished grammar school and high school (Ugh!) Set my own schedule for college classes, and...you guessed it...avoided Monday classes like plague villages of the Middle Ages.  That was nice. Plus, with college, you got spring breaks, final exams came much earlier than ever before and there was generally lots more time for having fun...if you didn't have to work part-time to avoid starvation and didn't really care that Cs made your transcript look like the printer key got stuck in one position and no one in the registrar noticed. Still, every weekend was a little nicer because it didn't end on Sunday nights. I kept my Mondays clear...life was good.

Then I really grew up.  So whose bright idea was it to start the work week on Mondays? Aargh!

What followed was 30+ years of Stormy mUNdays. (mUNday? That's found in the  dictionary as "The bleak 24 hour period immediately following Sunday which often hangs like a dark cloud and UNdoes or potentially obstructs all the fun to be enjoyed during the preceding 48 hours.") The only good thing about mUNday is the popularity that it brings for Fridays.  Surely, no day is celebrated more than Fridays by the greater masses. It's sort of like the last day of school, only it comes once a week.

Show of hands...? Who likes Mondays? (Of course there has to be one oddball in every group.) Put your hand down. Okay, what about Fridays? Okay. Okay. Put your hands down. Stop waving! It'll be over soon enough.  Once you start getting those AARP letters twice a month in the mail, it won't be long. Just a matter of time before they get your email address too.  Before you know it, you'll only know the different days of the week by the t.v. shows scheduled on your DVR.  I mean, nothing - no matter how long suffered - lasts forever. You'll either retire one day or you'll be taking a dirt nap. In some cases it's not obvious how different those options might be.

So finally every day is the same...when being retired means no ups and downs through the week...when Friday just means there will probably be more of a crowd in the grocery store..mUNday has become the day I just smile when it's rainy and cold in the morning and traffic reporters say you should probably call in sick.

But something's missing. I kinda miss the high of a Friday afternoon in early spring, when the thought of taking off early plays through your mind at lunchtime.  It was also kinda nice realizing through hump day that you'd made it and were heading downhill. Let's not leave out that guiltless bliss of calling in sick on a mUNday morning while still in your jammies, knowing that you'd just cheated the demon of his due.  Without the dread of mUNday, there wasn't so much to look forward to at the end of the week. Waah! How can this be??! How can I miss it??

So what's left for a late Boomer like me? Like you? What are other Boomers up to these days? Maybe I should've gone to those stupid retirement seminars? What's this retirement thing all about? I thought it finally meant "freedom."

I say it's: "Doing Time On Planet Earth" and I'd like to hear how you're doing your time?

Copyright 2013 D. EDWARD DYER  All rights reserved.